Tag: music nerd

  • Damn My Sensory Issues

    It is a bit intimidating trying to be active in the DIY scene, knowing that I can’t really go to shows. A lot of people say if you want to make friends in the scene to go to a show. Except I cannot go to a show alone without someone with me to make sure I am safe.

    I just see pictures from shows and see all the people and think, “Wow, I would not have handled that.” Having autism is not fun in these spaces when I am very hypersensitive. I enjoy listening to music by myself in a silent room, but a show has a ton of different sounds at once, and I’m sweaty. I end up not focusing on the music. I am very much at the back of the show, away from the action, so I can zone out and stim while listening to the band. When I do go, my battery is drained to nothing, and I am a zombie the next day. It takes a lot out of me.

    But this is if I go to a larger venue. A lot of the shows near me are in small places or house shows. I have never been to a house show because I do not know how safe it would be for me. The show I went to at my local record store was too much for me. I don’t know if I could handle someone’s basement.

    I love the music and art that comes out of these communities, but I feel I cannot really make friends because I can’t attend the events. I could attend for a little bit, but I fell fast before I had to leave. I’m not talking like I am uncomfortable. No, I am talking about a full-blown meltdown with self-harm behaviors. Leaving me at the show puts me in literal danger.

    My sensory processing disorder is something I have to make sure the person I am going with takes very seriously.

    The scene puts a lot of pressure on going to shows and stresses me out because I can’t handle it, but I really want to talk to people about the music. Which leaves me to online forums, but then I get crap for not going to shows. So…

    Yeah. It is tough.

  • Music Notes Stuck In My Mind

    I have ideas and the knowledge but I need the resources.

    I want to get back into performing music again. It was so fun and freeing. I want to have a good time and others to have a good time. The inspiration came from Atom and His Package, and Chumbawamba. I do like folk rhythms, so I kind of like what Pat the Bunny is doing with Friends In Real Life.

    Really I just need to get my hands on a midi controller and start making beats

    With the research I have been doing it really making me want to make music again!

    I do have a list a instruments I do want

    • Euphonium
    • Guitar (electric and a acoustic)
    • electric bass
    • a better trumpet

    I love how music brings people together and how it builds community. I miss being in a music community and would love to be more active in it again.

  • Music feeds my brain

    I had 69 days worth of hours of music listening in 2025

    How my music taste naturally came to me. Middle school was 2000’s emo and pop punk and show tunes, but then quickly I went into my hyperpop phase listening to Vocaloid and anime openings. To find then discovering Midwest emo in gym class to completely falling down the folk punk pipeline throughout the rest of high school but listening to Will Wood on blast. While trying to feel superior that I was not like the TikTok Will Wood fans but wearing the same hoodie everyday my senior year. To now listening to whatever sounds good to me.

    Recently I have been listening to a lot of Hip-Hop. It is a very satisfying genre to listen to. The music nerd in me has ample respect for how the songs are composed and how the artists make the different samples fit nicely.

    My politics have played a big part. In high school, I was going back and forth if I was an anarchist or a communist or both. Punk songs that were angry towards the government or on mainstream society felt like I had a place to fit as a young teen trans boy. Let us just say I listened to a lot of Laura Jane Grace when I was fourteen. Though a band that has always been my top is AJJ. Their songs have always seemed to fit into a different period of my life.

    But I liked hyperpop, because it was over stimulated and fit the void when I need a lot of sensory input.

    My music taste summed up is does this make my brain feel good, or do I really like how the lyrics flow and is an output for my anger. I am not person that lies when I say I will listen to any genre! I don’t bullshit about that.

  • Relating To Wassily Kandinsky

    Art arranged as music. It is something that I have not been able to get out of my head. For the past few weeks. I have been researching digital music making to college making.

    Well, how does that relate to Kandinsky?

    It had all started with my modern art history class and learning about Kandinsky and his different groups of artists.

    How they captured movement.

    I have been totally obsessed with and have done some deep research with the help of an old professor of mine.

    Mainly, because Kandinsky thought about his pieces as musical compositions. Something that I have not figured out is how to portray the compositions in my head.

    BUT! I did make a piece that is part of my recent deep dives for an upcoming summit inspired by the world of digital music making and how musicians use sampling. While I brought that in college form using found objects, for example, like old receipts, figure drawings from another class, random shiny paper I had, graph paper, and test paper for testing out acrylic ink. While layering acrylic paint to physically represent the many layers in a song.